Moody.

I woke up in the mood to write today. It's been a while since I've even wanted to start a new post, and I wouldn't let myself consider why. But, here it is: I've got 7-9 pounds that have come back on since Christmas and they will. not. leave. I don't want to make changes, therefore, I don't want to write about it. If I write about it, I have to admit it out loud, and then I'm committed.

When I look back at my weight loss chart, I was this weight back in July. It's like a 9-month maintenance plan, but I don't want to maintain this weight! When I consider what I've done (and not done) in those months, it's somewhat easy to see why I'm not losing, and why, for a long time, I didn't gain.

Paleo is not a weight loss method. That's right out there on any reputable Paleo expert's front door. It's clean eating, it's staying away from sugar and unnecessary foods, but it's not designed for weight loss - our ancestors weren't overweight! It's just often a side effect.  I think my HEALTH is better than it's been in a long time -- so now I have to get to the mix with Paleo that will push me to lose the weight. I think I'll be making this up as I go. And this is likely to look a lot like my posts from the first half of last year.

I'm fairly certain that it's the portion size and the snacks that are keeping the weight on (and adding a little). Yesterday I counted my calories -- deliberately staying out of the nuts and bacon -- just to see how I felt back around the 1200 calorie mark. I logged everything into Sparkpeople. It was very weird to do that again - I've definitely gotten used to just eating "approved" food and leaving the rest to chance.

As expected, my carbs are below their recommended 50% value, my protein is higher, and my fats are right in the middle. [As a confirmed Paleo-phile, it's going to be very hard for me not to get annoyed when they try to get me to eat to that plan, by the way.] I was hungry all day. :-( I snacked on fruit and ate three good meals, but it's obvious after only one day that i had probably been eating around 2000 calories regularly. That's fine for maintenance, but not for loss.

So I'm going to do this all week and see where I stand. And no more weeks of no blogging -- I need the accountability. The immediate goal is to get back to 162 - my lowest weight from last year. I don't want that to take 2 months, but we'll see what happens.

What I ate:

• Breakfast: Boiled egg and leftover squash/kale veggies, coffee with sugar-free creamer
• Lunch: Tuna salad (tuna, mayo, pickles) and an apple
• Snack: banana, grapes
• Dinner: Orange roughy, mashed cauliflower, sauteed snap peas/carrots/zucchini
• Dessert: 1 glass of red wine

Calories: 1,288

There it is. We'll see how my Paleo recipes translate into calories - something I probably should have done a long time ago. More to come. It could be a really long week.